


it's the most injurious time of the year

by mildlydiscouraging



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Christmas, Humor, Kidnapping, M/M, Prompt Fill, Secret Santa, Typical Night Vale Weirdness, WTNVSS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-22
Updated: 2015-12-22
Packaged: 2018-05-08 08:48:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5491064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mildlydiscouraging/pseuds/mildlydiscouraging
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cecil starts hanging up stockings in front of the fireplace on December 2nd and Carlos is relieved. It's his fourth Christmas in Night Vale and he still doesn't really know what to expect. He's slightly disappointed, but more reassured to see some things never change.</p><p>Of course, that's when Cecil goes to start pouring coal into them.</p><p>(or, five Night Valeian Christmas traditions that confused Carlos and one that he actually understood.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	it's the most injurious time of the year

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ChromaticWasp](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChromaticWasp/gifts).



> my [wtnv secret santa](http://wtnvss.tumblr.com) gift for [chromaticwasp](http://chromaticwasp.tumblr.com)!!! writing this was really fun, and i tried to incorporate at least a little bit of all your prompts, i hope u enjoy!!!! happy christmas, holidays, etc.

_1._

Cecil starts hanging up stockings in front of the fireplace on December 2nd and Carlos is relieved.

It's his fourth Christmas in Night Vale and he still doesn't really know what to expect. The past three haven't been much to go on (losing all his memories to the Man in the Tan Jacket, being consumed by science (much to Cecil's disappointment), and living in the desert otherworld, respectively) and it wouldn't be the first time he's seen holiday traditions different in Night Vale. He's slightly disappointed, but more reassured to see some things never change.

Of course, that's when Cecil goes to start pouring coal into them.

When Carlos asks why, he does that thing with his face that he always does when there's something so Night Vale Ordinary, as Carlos has come to call it, that he's never thought to question. He explains, like he would to a small child, that if they don't fill the stockings with coal, Santa will snatch them. That also explains why the stockings have other people's names on them, now that Carlos thinks about it.

He decides not to question why, chalking it up to something along the lines of Passover, and goes back to his gift wrapping.

 

_2._

NVCR starts a three hour block of Christmas music every night after Cecil's show. It happens to coincide with their normal dinner cooking time, so Carlos delights in the homely feeling of familiar carols and peeling carrots (purple ones, but that's besides the point).

It's only when he starts listening to the lyrics that he becomes concerned, hearing distinctly something about _chipmunks_ roasting on an open fire, but then Cecil pulls him into a waltz and he pushes it to the back of his mind.

 

_3._

The attic in their home seems to be endless, and the boxes of decorations Cecil has stashed up there just as infinite. Even into the second week of December, he's still hanging up tinsel (that looks a lot like barbed wire) and garlands (which look like poison ivy).

He's lighting candles when Carlos comes home with some decoration of his own. Carlos toes off his shoes and walks up to him, hand hidden behind his back.

"Guess what I've got," he says. Cecil raises an eyebrow instead of answering and Carlos lifts his hand over their heads as he continues, "Mistletoe!"

Cecil immediately plucks the green out of his hand and throws it into the nearest newly lit candle. When Carlos looks at him with wide, confused eyes, he sighs and says that mistletoe is dangerous.

"Well, yeah, I know it's poisonous, but I wasn't gonna eat it," Carlos explains.

"What about when it eventually spontaneously combusts?" Cecil asks. Carlos just squints his eyes a little and shakes his head, kissing him anyway. It's the thought that counts, after all.

 

_4._

By the time Cecil invites him to the station's holiday party, Carlos is more than a little nervous. Christmas was usually his favorite time of the year, but as it seemed with all holidays in Night Vale, it was due to be a more fatal one than he was used it.

But, he decided, he had to suck it up and deal with it, so he lets Cecil pick them out festive sweaters and follows the recipe Earl sends him to bake gingerbread and tries to calm down.

Cecil mentions that there will be Secret Santa, but "you don't have to do it if you feel uncomfortable," and that makes Carlos feel more uneasy than anything else. When they actually get to that point of the party and one of the interns jumps off a filing cabinet with a butterfly knife in hand, he's glad he didn't put his name in the hat.

 

_5._

Carlos really regrets not taking Cecil seriously last week when he said on the radio, "Santa Claus is coming to town. All residents of Night Vale are urged to prepare themselves for battle," because now he's waking up in a cell that is distinctly too cold for the desert and also smells like peppermint?

Upon closer examination, after the spinning feeling in his head has calmed down, he sees that the bars of his cell are actually made of candy canes. Literal candy canes, around the same thickness as a particularly large water bottle.

It only takes him a few minute to lick at one of the bars and erode it enough to break through, and thankfully the space between the bar is wide enough that one broken cane leaves him enough room to wiggle out. The floor outside is definitely covered in ice and Carlos swears he hears a menacing chuckle at the other end of the hall before he slides around the corner and winds his way to the surface.

His toes are frozen but the door at the top opens to the small bit of empty lot left in back of the New Old Opera House, and when he turns around, all he sees is the usual garbage bins and some graffiti that looks kind of like a sleigh, kind of like a gang sign.

He goes home.

 

_+1._

The first thing Cecil does when Carlos opens the door is pull him in far enough to slam the door shut behind him.

"Oh sweet Carlos, are you okay?" He asks, his hands hovering around his shoulders, sides, neck, unsure of where to check first. "I didn't think they would take you this year, they usually only take first-timers."

"I guess they knew I hadn't really celebrated Night Vale Christmas before." Carlos lets himself be led over to the sofa, which is thankfully clear of any tinsel. He'd gotten pricked by some earlier that week and it made everything look a lot more pink than usual for about an hour.

Cecil pulls the blanket off the back of the sofa and rests his head on top of Carlos's when he leans on his shoulder. They sit there in silence, Carlos trying to get the smell of pine out of his nose and Cecil focusing on their steady, matching heartbeats. After a while, Cecil opens his eyes and happens to look at the clock on the mantle.

"Hey Carlos?" He yawns a little in response, having been sliding towards sleep. "It's midnight, it's Christmas. Can I give you your present?"

Carlos nods, albeit a little hesitantly. He's had a long day, and he's really not sure what to expect anymore. After all, he had just been kidnapped by Santa.

Reluctantly pulling off the warm blanket, he follows Cecil to the bedroom where he grabs his present from under the bed and Cecil grabs his from the top of the closet. They had both known where the other had hidden their gift, but Cecil hadn't wanted to ruin the surprise and Carlos had been too scared to touch it.

"You first." Cecil gestures for Carlos to sit on the bed with him and hands him his present. It's wrapped in ordinary dark green paper and has a red ribbon that's slightly lopsided. Attached is a card that addresses it to "Carlos xoxoxoxoxo" and it calms him down a bit. This is _Cecil_ , the last person on Earth he should worry about being physically hurt by.

He peels off the wrapping paper to find... An ordinary journal. Not stained with blood or covered in mucus, just an ordinary, beautiful leather bound journal.

While he'd been distracted, Cecil had wedged his own gift out from under Carlos's arm and torn the silver paper off his various weird socks.

"Oh Carlos, I love them!" Cecil snaps the tags off the neon purple fur ones and pulls them on over the plain socks he was already wearing. "I'm going to wear them every day, I hope you know that."

"It's just a journal," Carlos says, turning it over and over in his hands, transfixed by the sheer normalcy of it.

Cecil's face drops a little, still absent mindedly petting his new socks. "Do you... not like it?" He asks uncertainly.

Carlos throws his arms around his neck in reply, journal still in hand as he whispers, "I love it, of course I do, I love you."

Sighing in relief, Cecil hugs him back just as tightly and says, "I thought you could write down any non-scientific thoughts you have, because I know you already have notebooks for that stuff but if you ever want to indulge in your creative side, you should have a place to do it mostly away from prying eyes."

Carlos laughs and shakes his head, drawing back just far enough to look his boyfriend in the eye.

"Merry Christmas, Cecil."

"Merry Christmas, Carlos."

**Author's Note:**

> happy holidays everybody!! here's hoping you dont get kidnapped by santa this year
> 
> (hey, eta from 2016: i just found out/realized cecil is jewish (intended to be? is? yeah) so uh sorry. that sounds disingenuous, i really am, but i already wrote the fic and it was a gift so i don't wanna alter it. i do apologize though.)
> 
> tumblr @[moonfullofstars](http://moonfullofstars.tumblr.com)


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